My last pitty party!

I have been doing very well for months now. Well I still gets all fire up when he does stuff I do not agree with but overall I felt I was doing well! It only took 2 bottles of wine, a moving truck and his attitude to turn an afternoon into the biggest breakdown I ever had! And of course my parents in law had to show up when I am at my drunkest to explain to me how they feel I was over controlling and I suffocated him through our years of marriage! Then I seriously do not know what I said, maybe it’s better I do not remember!  I gave him the satisfaction to see me drunk, weak, looking like a mess; which is frustrating because I have been avoiding giving him this power for months. Well no good story start with a salad so my new story started with wine! Lol Every step of a separation you think you feel like you have reach the top, then you have to climb a little more and a little more….  So yesterday turn out to be a pitty party; poor me, mean him…. Bla bla bla… I wake up this morning super ashamed of what I looked like but really I wake up with a house empty of baggage and the sun is shining bright. So 6 months of speaking about Him, is enough. Now it is all about the girls, my friends, my home, my work and me. I am excited for all the good things to come! I am feeling sad my kids saw me in this stage so it is my job to explain and fix it: mommy is human after all!  They need a strong mommy. I went back on the move on wagon: meditation, visualization, expressing gratitude and counting blessing, making plans for the future and being nice to myself. The best thing you can do is jump in the wagon while understanding you will have break down and it is ok!  The wagon need to be tune occasionally, surround yourself with good people!