Old habits don’t die!

We promised to help my sister to move first week end of September. I found out 4 days prior! I always keep my words and there was no way I would have let my sister down because he screw up! Knowing it would be our last family week end get away, I decided we would honor our commitment and drive to Qc. Part of the process of realization is actually our mind deciding to forget! I was able to be respectful, smiling and funny. I didn’t have to try very hard, I just blocked the recent event and try to enjoy each moment. Ok I did it for the kids but also because part of me needed to experience our family one last time. It wasn’t easy, I told my family and cried in their arms while Him wasn’t around. Him asked me why they were so nice with him, I just answered; In my family we are classy! and it is true, my family were mad and supportive but for me and the kids they were able to treat him as usual. All week end I called him Hunny, babe, etc. I would correct myself but habits don’t die easy. It was very uncomfortable I think for everyone but it was part of my grieving. I won’t lie, living like nothing was going on probably slowed down my recovery of a few days but things that were common wouldn’t be anymore and I wanted to capture our family one more time. I guess what I am trying to say is: you will experience moment where your brain will go in ”us mode”, meaning referring to what you had and loved. You will have moment where you will need to relive the past; just remember that this also mean slowing down your progress. You are the only one that know the right speed to move forward just remember that you are now your priority. I didn’t act nice with Him to please him I did it for me that week end.